Instead of “FOR-WARNS HU-man-it-TY”, add in a half rest and sing “for-WARNS hu-MAN-i-TY”. (The “WARNS hu” would be a dotted 8th and a 16th.)
This is a fundamentally good song. Very nice guitar work, great melody, well sung by Curtis. I like the melodica too. A re-recording with cleaned up guitar might be all it needs. Nevertheless, a few observations:
Apart from the first bullet, there are some awkward words and rhythms. Perhaps some attention to the lyrics would fix that.
This is a very spare arrangement, and maybe it should stay that way. However, the guitar picking does not always emphasize the right bass note, and I’m thinking some kind of bass line, but very understated, perhaps a cello or bass violin.
Or maybe just add a second guitar to pick and emphasize the desired bass line (a 12 string would be great!)
Late breaking observation: I do get a little melody fatigue by the end since the same melody is repeated 5 times in this song and there is no bridge or chorus to provide an alternative. I would call that a structural weakness. This is a very nice melody, but it needs something else to go with it.